The Little Things Which Are Important

I never really prayed , or I don't want to remember to, but it has come to a point in my life, where I'm begging for enlightenment. I do not believe in God, a conjured essence of human weakness. I do not believe in miracles, nor do I believe in all the imperfections the church has bestowed unto a holy body. I do however, believe in a pattern of nature. It is something beyond my knowledge, a spiritual being inside every one of us, in every man, in every creature on this land, and in every stone and tree on our planet. It is something perfect, grandeur than a man-made god. The universal spirit is eternal, immutable. It is everything, and in everything. We cannot understand it because we are part of it. Our life, our existence, is the reason to be and the only proof of this pattern in nature.

I do not understand what I'm doing in life, or what I should be doing, except for the fact that I am living, and I need to live this life until I die. I do love, I despair, I can cry and I am able to become happy. Emotions flavour my existence and keep me going. Yet, I still cannot understand my place in all of this. I strive to learn and to make up my own ideas about all of it, but I have always come to one conclusion - that maybe I should stop looking. Maybe I should stop asking, doubting, questioning, and I should enjoy the very essence of being alive. I should be grateful of having the possibility of life - to be able to care for someone, to get angry, to laugh and  to smile, because a lot of people will lose this opportunity very early on in their life, or never had the chance of even existing in the first place. We are lucky, and thus, we should be grateful.